Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Literal Revamp

"The hardest thing for a writer to do is write"

That quote is amazingly accurate. For some reason, those of us filled with the passion to write are the ones who have the hardest time putting words to paper. The excuses seem easier to share than the creation. For example, here is my current list of excuses:

-I just had baby number 2
-I am EXHAUSTED. Chasing after a two year old, taking care of a new born, keeping my home clean...can I just sleep now?
-On that note...my "me time" is sleep time
-Writers...block...
-I feel like no one really does like my writing, so...why write?
-Lack of motivation. Lack of...anything
-Have I mentioned that I am tired?

Ok, now that I have gotten those out of my system...none of them are truly any good reason as to why I haven't taken anytime to write for over a month now. Yes, I am tired. And busy. And "blocked." But how will I get past any of that if I just use it as an excuse? Will I ever write again?

True, if it felt like I had readers biting at the bit to read my scribbled words, I just may be spilling them more. But that is in an ideal world. In all reality, most writers remain barely known, mostly supported only by family and close friends. It is rare to become a JK Rowling or Stephenie Meyer. Its like saying every single lady out there has a glass slipper waiting in hand of a prince with an amazing hair cut and glittering blue eyes. Sadly...not true. Though I do still say *ahem* that a bit more support from those who know me would be nice...what kind of writer would I be if I based all my creations off of the reader count? Well, actually, I would be what I am right now: Not writing.

I started this blog with the statement that I need to find me. That I love writing and need to find that space in my day to do one thing for me-me, not for mommy-and-wife-me.

Though my eyes now burn and my head swims with the lack of sleep... (Baby number 2, don't get me wrong. I love you. But please...night time is for sleeping.)

And though my two year old would rather me be at his side at all hours, playing and wrestling and giving him cookies...

My kitchen sink may not always be shiny. And the laundry may not always be sorted, washed, folded, AND put away...

I am not failing at that job. I have a happy home. An *almost* always clean home.
The job I am starting to stray from is the one that makes me feel more like me once again. It is SO easy to be lost when you become a stay at home mom. Too easy in fact.

So, I need to slightly revamp my writing goal. Writing a prompt every single day, at this time in my life, is just too impossible to do. I will keep it posted as my challenge, in the hopes that someday (maybe soon?) I will actually be able to achieve that. Until then, here will be my new, personal goal:

-Write one prompt a week.
-Blog at least one entry a week of my writing thoughts...tips, tricks, complaints: anything.
-Finally sit down and start plucking words for one of my book ideas. No set goal per week for that one yet...let's see how I do so far with what I already listed.

Alright! There we go!
Now then, I know I have a small handful of followers out there in cyber world. I am hoping you are reading this, and will read my more scattered ramblings as they come. Maybe even give me feedback? Maybe? It feels good to do this again. To feel the buttons clicking under finger as I quickly type out word after word...Let us hope I can at least somewhat stick to this newly revamped goal.

Until my next entry...both boys are sleeping and I think it is time my head hit a pillow too.